16 May 2011

Two men were out playing golf on a nice Saturday afternoon. They were getting frustrated, though, because the two women who were playing right in front of them were quite slow, and were holding up the men's game. "Don't they know they're supposed to let us play through?" asked the first man. The other man shook his head. "I'm going to go ask them if we can play through," said the first man, emphatically, "Enough is enough." He started walking over toward the women, but as he got close, he suddenly turned around and came back, white as a ghost. "Oh God," he said to his friend, "This is awful. You're going to have to ask those women if we can play through. You see, one of them is my wife, and the other is my mistress." The other man shrugged, and said "No sweat. " He walked over toward the women, and just as he was getting close, turned around and came running back to his pal. His eyes wide open, he said, "Small world!"

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Two vampire bats wake up in the middle of the night, thirsty for blood. One says, "Let's fly out of the cave and get some blood. "We're new here," says the second one. "It's dark out, and we don't know where to look. We'd better wait until the other bats go with us. "The first bat replies, "Who needs them? I can find some blood somewhere. " He flies out of the cave. When he returns, he is covered with blood. The second bat says excitedly, "Where did you get the blood? "The first bat takes his buddy to the mouth of the cave. Pointing into the night, he asks, "See that black building over there? "Yes," the other bat answers. "Well," says the first bat, "I didn't."

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In most offices, the photocopier is out of order every now and then. One copy repairman had answered question after question for the employees. Finally one day, he just smiled and handed them this sheet. The copier is out of order! Yes, we have called the service man. Yes, he will be in today. No, we cannot fix it. No, we do not know how long it will take. No, we do not know what caused it. No, we do not know who broke it. Yes, we are keeping it. No, we do not know what you are going to do now. Thank You